Rebound Relationships – 5 Signs You’re In One!

Rebound RelationshipsRebound relationships take a variety of shapes and sizes. While many ‘rebounders’ take the old adage, the best way to get over someone is to get under someone else, to heart and use a new relationship to get beyond an old one, many people don’t even realize they are in a rebound relationship. For some a relationship on the rebound can be an effective way to get beyond a recent break up. But if you’re the person they are rebounding with, you might find yourself being used and left heartbroken.

Of course rebound relationships don’t start with the plan to hurt someone else. It is just an attempt to stop the pain and replace it with more pleasant feelings. But you may want to protect yourself and your heart from a person who isn’t looking to get serious, but just for emotional solace.

Look for these signs to find out if you’re in a rebound relationship.

Sign #1 – He/She Has Just Gotten Out Of A Relationship

Time heals all wounds. It is a saying often uttered after the death of a loved one or a relationship. It may be trite but it is true, which is why one of the biggest indicators of rebound relationships is they are freshly out of a relationship. Has your new partner been single for a month or less? Then it is likely that this new relationship you’re so excited about is a Band-Aid for them.

This doesn’t mean you can meet someone fresh out of a relationship and have a genuine connection. It just means that the heart needs time to heal after a break up so it has a chance to really open up to someone else. Despite their protests you may want to take it slow—very slow—until you are confident they aren’t harboring hopes of reconciliation.

Sign #2 – You Know Everything…About The Ex

One of the reasons many rebound relationships end is jealousy. No, not because there is any cheating going but because your new sweetheart talks about the ex…all the time. You know nearly every transgression the ex has ever committed. You know every complaint ever uttered, favorite foods and anniversary mishaps and you haven’t even been together all that long. This is not a good sign if your heart is set on long-term status.

If your new love is talking about their ex a lot it means that they are still thinking about the ex a lot. If they were well and truly over their last partner and last relationship, they wouldn’t spend so much time talking about the ex.

Rebound relationships like this breed a ton of jealous because eventually you will begin to feel as though you are being compared to the ex. If that’s the case it’s only human to wonder, how do I measure up.

Sign #3 – Hot & Cold Behavior

You may not have anything against rebound relationships but you might find the hot and cold behavior a little tiresome. This is another clear sign that you are in a rebound relationship…unless your partner is just a moody artistic type.

You fell for your new partner because they are so passionate and fully of life. They are very emotional and never shy away from public displays of affection. But just as quickly they grow cold and distant and you want to know why. The simple answer is that rebound relationships are all about moving on. Specifically they are about forcing yourself to move on. So the ‘hot’ behavior is all about them making that effort to honestly move on from their past relationship. But the cold distant behavior is about them remembering their ex or the pain of the break up and fear of another serious relationship.

Be careful that you aren’t confusing a commitmentphobe with a rebound relationship.

Sign #4 – All About Sex

Most new relationships go through a period of heat where neither of you can keep your hands off one another. As the relationship progresses the passion is still there but not all day every day. But in rebound relationships sex is a big part of the equation because it comes with the instant feel good hormones. Let’s face it; break ups suck. They are painful and depressing and a bunch of other negative emotions. The best way to suppress those emotions is to replace them with guaranteed feel goods. Sex.

If you feel that 90% of your relationship is sex and you have no idea how the rest of the relationship is going, you are one of the many unsuspecting people in rebound relationships.

Sign #5 – They Still Talk To Ex…A Lot

Yes it is true that we all hope we’re mature enough to remain friendly or at least civil with our exes. The truth however is that we need time away from our exes to truly heal after a break up. If you find that your current squeeze still spends a lot of time talking to their former squeeze, you could be a love on the rebound.

Rebound relationships happen because we are desperate to feel something other than heart-wrenching pain. Seeking solace in another person’s arms is the best way to accomplish this in the short term. But the inability to let go of the ex should tell you that the previous relationship isn’t as previous as you would like it to be.

Rebound Relationships Can Last

The mere fact that your current partner is freshly out of a relationship doesn’t mean your love can’t last. You should however pay attention to warning signs that make you feel uncomfortable or insecure. If your partner is newly single pay extra close attention to make sure you’re not setting yourself up for a relationship that isn’t going anywhere.

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