How To Rekindle A Marriage In 5 Simple Steps

How to rekindle a marriageWhether you have been married for 1 year or 25 years it is a commonly held belief that the passionate fires of early days begins to wane. Most couples want to know how to rekindle a marriage before the embers become so cool the relationship is beyond help. But the fact that you’re reading this article means you are prepared to put in the work to keep your marriage not just alive, but thriving.

The first step is admitting that your marriage needs to be rekindled because, as much as we all wish it were, marriage is not all romantic walks and exotic flower bouquets. Rekindling your marriage is about much more than rekindling your sex life, which may need a resuscitation of its own because when life gets busy sex is the first thing we sacrifice. The important part of learning how to rekindle a marriage is about rekindling the spirit you had in the beginning.

Is It Life…Or Something More?

Before you embark on a journey back to the exhilarating days of your relationship there is one important question you must ask; is your marriage waning due to typical life obligations or is it something more? It is an important distinction to make because bigger problems that have been bubbling under the surface may require more than a bit of creativity and excitement.

If you and your husband have simply been too busy to focus on one another and give your relationship the priority it deserves, the steps below will teach you how to rekindle your marriage before the distance grows too great.

Get Excited

The attitude with which you approach something new is as important as the effort you put forth so when you want to rejuvenate your marriage you should get excited about it! After all it is exciting to rekindle your relationship and get back to these giddy days when you couldn’t stop laughing together or keep your hands off one another.

Get excited about the things you’ll do together in an effort to get back to those glory days. Reminisce about the spontaneous things you used to do together or talk about your plans on how to rekindle a marriage with difficulties like yours. Discuss how you would like to spend a typically boring Saturday afternoon or a new restaurant you’d like to try.
The point is you should both approach rekindling your marriage as a new adventure to share.

Reconnect Regularly

One of the problems most marriages run into is that, while you see each other regularly and catch up on household obligations, couples rarely take time each day to simply chat. Don’t focus on bills, kids, chores or problems. Instead talk about something interesting you read in the paper, a new project you’re participating in at work or a new recipe you’d like to try.

Sure it seems mundane but learning how to rekindle a marriage means being able to simply chat about your lives as individuals. First and foremost you are friends right? So why not talk again like friends do; catching up on current events and maybe even gossip or other lighthearted topics.

The goal here is to relate to each other positively about life instead of just talking about things like bills and kids.

Share Something New

The first thing many couples do when they are working on their relationship is set up a date night and that is a great idea. However you should focus on doing something new and exciting instead of heading to your favorite restaurant…again. The key to learning how to rekindle a marriage is to infuse it with excitement.

Do something different than you’d normally do together. If you’d normally hike together, try a museum or a cooking class. If you love excitement, sign up for skydiving lessons. Or act like tourists in your hometown and see the city from the eyes of an outsider.

Sharing a new activity will remind you what it’s like to have fun together and it’ll give you more topics of conversation. As an added bonus it will also give you ideas for your next outing.

Talk About Sex

You have been together for some time now so talking about sex shouldn’t be something to be embarrassed or coy about. If you want to know how to rekindle a marriage, it begins with a frank talk about sex.

Talking about sex together can help get you feeling sexy and in the mood, but more importantly, it will make sure you both are on the page sexually. You should address the kinds of things you both are interested in trying as well as what you are unwilling to try.

Keep in mind you may have to talk about this more than once before it finally begins to take hold. In fact you can talk about one fantasy or turn-on at a time and then focus on that this time and then something new next time.

Remember The Little Things

When it comes to know how to rekindle a marriage it is important to remember the little things. Often it is forgetting to do those things that wreak the most havoc in a marriage. Try focusing on these little things each day and you’ll find your way back to one another.

For example take time for a hug and a kiss each day, just to connect physically and feel that intimacy and love you share. The problem in your marriage isn’t that you’ve stopped loving, caring or desiring one another. The problem is that you’ve forgotten to show it.

Learning how to rekindle a marriage is simple, as you can see, but it does take some time. Commit to making your marriage a priority and you’ll be back on the road to wedded bliss.

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